Oh! My Name!

What is the question you have come across with the most in your life? I think it would be "What is your name?". In my case, another question follows when I say my name. So for me there are 2 questions I have faced most in my life. The second question comes with a perplexed expression on their face and the question is "What does it mean?" Can't blame them for their curiosity as they would be hearing the name "Bhaimi" for the first time. They ask it twice,say it twice to ensure they pronounce it correctly and then the question "What is the meaning of Bhaimi?" comes. Aaaha.. I knew this question would come and I'm ready with the twenty five thousand two hundred and forty first repetition of my name's history. I tap the play button.

"Bhaimi is actually the name of a Hindu Purana character. Her Actual name is Damayanthi. You might have heared of Nala-Damayanthi and their love story. Damayanthi's father's name was Bhimasena and thus she has this name "Bhaimi" .It is like "Bhim ki beti-Bhaimi".

(Water pleaseeeeeeeee.....)

Then comes the next comment "Oh.. that's why you eat like Bhima..ha ha". Now I have to stop them and explain- "my dear friend, I'm sorry about your ignorance, but it is not that Bhima in Mahabharata i'm talking about. This is a different Maharaja, whose name also was Bhimasena".

This story telling sessions occur mostly during my travels. Especially train travels from kerala when I have the luxurious 24 hours to explain my name's origin. But there were incidents to my surprise when the other person explains the story better than I do. One such incident was when I was travelling to Kerala from Hyderabad few years back and a family consisting of an elderly lady, her daughter and husband, grand daughter and great grandson shared the coach with me. I remember that they belong to the famous Moos family in Pulamanthole. When I said my name the elderly lady exclaimed and said "Nice Name!". Then she went ahead to add the Bhim ki Beti story by herself to admire my name and complimented me for having a princess's name. Interestigly the elderly lady's great grand son's name was"Angirassu". I was happy when he said his name as very rarely I get a chance to hear somebody elses 'name story'. Though I knew that Angirassu is a name of one old Rishi in Hindu Mythology I loved to hear him explaining it with pride. He was only 10 years old, I'm sure this enthusiasm to tell his 'Name Story' will soon fade away as he grows. His younger brother's name is 'Purooravass'. I can foresee people's reaction when that little fellow starts telling his name. Ha ha..

I used to hate my name for several reasons when I was in school. First of all I thought it was a tough name to pronounce. It was difficult for others to understand as well. Many people hear it as 'by me' or 'buy me' when I say Bhaimi. They ask me 'Why should I buy you?' or 'what is the cost to buy?' to joke on me. When small children call me it becomes 'bahimi aunty' or 'Balumi chechi' and what not!! But the second reason was really a solid reason to hate my name. I was a fat girl. Everybody used to call me Bheemi as they relate the fat Bhimasena in Mahabharata. They found it amusing and I used to get hurt. Many a times I fought with my mother for a name change and she just smiled at me. It was given to me by my grandfather. I hated him also for that reason.

But now I know the value of this name. I just love my name. i have seen people struggling to get e-mail ids by adding all those numerals and special characters like smitha2000_123@soandso.com when I just signup in any site with bhaimi@soandso.com. This unique name gives me recognition in my company and wherever I go. When I make calls to my tailor, beauty parlour or my office receptionist , they dont ask me which Bhaimi is speaking. I enjoy the way different people pronounce my name like Nalini calls me 'Beymi', Mike Jasko and Boomer calls me 'Baaimi' and even my house owner calls me 'Baima'. :)

My husband's name is so common that every third person in a shopping mall or theatre would be Santhosh. We named our son "Devamithran" which is also sort of unique. I don't know when he is going come to fight with me for a name change!

Hydera(bad). Truly!

When I wanted to change my job 5 years ago I never thought I will end up in a company in Hyderabad. I thought I would easily get a job in Bangalore and left for this city to stay for a month and I wouldn't miss any walk-ins that were happening in the city then. One of my friends had an interview call from a company and he had no clue of the place where it was happening as he was new in Bangalore, and I knew the place. I went to this company’s hiring stall to show my friend the place. But at last it happened so that I could attend the interview and I got selected with a decent pay package and my friend couldn’t get through the first round itself.

I was disappointed. I was unhappy for 2 reasons. First reason obviously was that my friend travelled from Kerala only to attend this interview and he couldn’t make it. And the second was that, the HR representative had told me that my posting would be in Hyderabad, not Bangalore. Bangalore was as dear to me as Cochin and I had many friends, cousins and other relatives there. But Hyderabad seemed scary to me. My idea of Hyderabad was that of a city with unclean and old buildings and roads and a city where Hind-Muslim tension always exists. In Hyderabad I had no relatives and didn’t have many close friends too. Finally I decided to accept the offer after having lot of discussions re-discussions with friends. My idea was to find another job in Bangalore in 6 months time and go back.

But, Hyderabad surprised me when I actually landed here. It was a clean and green city. Leave the old city area apart, the rest of the city had well maintained roads, trees on either sides of the roads, flowers and creepers on the dividers etc etc. The traffic was horrible but it didn’t bother me much as I managed to get a place to stay just 5 minutes walk from the office. And to my surprise my Telugu colleagues were so supportive and co-operative in contrary to what I’ve heard of telugu IT people. The girl who came to stay for 6 months did not even think of applying for another job in another city for 5 years!

Now…

I stopped encouraging people to come to Hyderabad as life here has become hell these days. Imagine a city with only potholes and no road to drive on. Imagine a city with 7 hours power cut. 4 hours announced and “only-god-knows-hours” unannounced. A city where the flyover at construction collapses to kill passer-by. City where a completed flyover on a busiest road waits for the Chief Minister to come back from his B’day Celebration in Maldives to get it inaugurated. 200 year old Banyan Trees gets chopped mercilessly in this city. All these scenes replace some of the old scenes I remember like, a small gutter gets repaired immediately after it was formed, power cuts were a total no-no and big trees were brought into the city by lorries from outskirts to plant on the road sides. I don’t know if you will find another city in india where traffic police men are considered junks. Here in the Electricity Office they do readily accept that the system is 95% corrupted and they are helpless. You go to any gas (Indane) agency and enjoy their fabulous customer service and cook food with air. Go to RTA and learn how to bribe without any hindrance and embarrassment.

I longed to settle down in this city once upon a time. I no longer do.For now, let me dream of a small house in Valparai. After all, in India cities are all the same.

Gosh! I am not financially Independent

No..No.. you guessed it wrong. I didn't mean to say that I have to beg before my husband for a hundred bucks to get my pedicure done. Nor does it mean that I am complaining of not earning enough. Was just going through Vinayah's blog (which I happened to step in during a google search and now in my favourites) where he loudly thinks how independent he is financially. He was mentioning this based on this

So let me see how independent I am this way.

Freedom from financial reliance on loved ones

Yes. I'm finacially not dependent on my loved ones. I started earning at the age of 20, that is soon after my graduation. The first stipend of Rs.1300 I got from my part time job as a machine room co-ordinator in a leading software training institute was more than sufficient for me to meet my expenses then. It also served for an extravaganza of having an american chopsey with a friend or having a vanilla-chocolate double sundae or grabing that chiken worked light blue salwar suit once in a while. It was a good and steady growth from there, and the earnings also grew decently in par with my needs. (Should I say it vice versa? :) )

Freedom from financial reliance on creditors

Nope! :(

I have the positive points of
1. Not having any credit card debt.
2. Not having any education loans to be paid.
3. Not having any home loans to be paid.
4. Having independent life insurance to take care of my dependents.
5. Having some fixed assets which may be helpful in the distant future.

I have some neutral points. Why I say they are neither positive nor negative because I enjoy the benefits as they exist as of now but they are totally dependent on my job.
1. I have health insurance for myself offered by my employer.
2. I have health insurance for my dependents, offered by my employer
3. I do not owe money to any person (This is partially true, as I owe 25000 to George but not a negative point as I have kept the amount separately in an account to give it to him. Where does he have time to come back to India? ;) )

Oh! My negative points:
1. I have a car loan to be paid - 3.5 more years left.
2. I have a personal loans to be paid - 1 more year left.
3. I do not have a sufficient emergency fund in place.
4. I do have to worry at the news of IT companies giving layoffs and when dollar gets sick & weak.

Freedom from financial reliance on employment
No way! Atleast as of now, I cannot even think of not having those rush hours in the morning so I can enjoy a cup of tea at ease in the morning. And go to pickup grocery at 11 a.m, avoiding the endless queue in food world in the evenings. And curl up in the sofa to catch up a nap watching that boring Malayalam serials they show in the afternoons. No.. I have a long long way to reach there. (I'm sure those serials would still be continuing with the heroine's grand daughter getting married to her ex-boyfriends step daughter's son and they meet after years at the wedding reception! )

Now, coming to establishing a plan to achieve my financial goals. Aaha! I have a very easy way. Turn to my husband and say,
I do baby sit
I do sweeping and mopping
I do dishes
I do laundry
I do house keeping
I do cooking
I do grocery shopping
I do inviting/talking to our relatives and friends and maintain the relationships fresh
Then why do I need to work too? Honey, you take care of all the financial responsibility and let me be financially independent. Wow! :)

Poor Guy. The next day I would see his blog with his list of additional financial burdens.. he.. he...

Now, no joke, I have to think seriously of some "freedom from worry" plans.

Here I begin

I am just another person in the ocean of fellow human beings in this big big world. That's all I am. Atleast that much I am!